Even amongst the craziness, I still managed to wish Chris into our day. I suppose because I'm female, I never quite understood the big deal about trains. I used to tease Chris when, while eating at our favorite outdoor restaurant, he would act like a little boy upon seeing a train pass. Without fail, he would yell, "Train! Train!" He would have loved every minute of laying on the floor with Ian driving his new Thomas trains around.
The hardest thing for me to imagine is how Chris would have been with Claire on Christmas. Every day, I wonder what kind of dad he would have been like to a daughter. I think I was safe in picturing him pushing her doll around in her new stroller and telling her how pretty she looked in her jewelry box mirror. But I just don't know...
Thanks for the calls and emails letting me know you were thinking about me. I hope you all had a wonderful holiday.
This is us without you, Chris. Merry Christmas, honey.
These are the sweetest pictures! Now I am crying...
ReplyDeleteEspecially since I just read Hallie's newest update (Botkin's blog) and am so sad for her. I'm glad that you found it and can also offer some words of encouragement.
I was thinking that our first Christmas wasn't awful either. "Over-compensation" was the theme of this year's holiday. Hopefully next year won't be so extravagant. (A girl can dream.)
Wendy,
ReplyDeleteGod bless you and your children. We lost a daughter and grandaughter in 2009 at the end of my daughter's pregnancy. We continue to pray for the ability to understand. It does get better.
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Used a wad of kleenex while reading your latest installment. Thinking of you, your friend, Rosanne
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